Venting your author frustrations

27 01 2017

frustrationEvery scientist worth her salt has had her share of annoying interactions with journal editors — both verbally and via e-mail. My friend and colleague Bill Laurance, Distinguished Research Professor at James Cook University, is no exception, and penned this hypothetical exchange between an author and editor as a way of venting his frustrations. Enjoy!

Author to Journal Editor, at a conference

Author: “You know, if I could sniff my own butt like you do, I would.”

Editor: Wags butt like he’s wagging his tail

Author: “Then again, maybe I wouldn’t …”

Editor: “You’re taking this kind of personally.”

Author:  “You think howling after getting kicked in the nuts by three referees is ‘taking it personally’? How about if I kick you in the nuts and we see how you go?”

Editor: “Sorry, I have to maintain editorial impartiality.”

Author: “I wonder if you’ll stay impartial after I stick this in your ear?” Read the rest of this entry »